This morning I lost it. I really try hard to keep it all together and not let things affect me. I might snap here and there but I try and keep a lot in. Last night the last thing I said to Kaiya was....make sure you get up early enough in the morning to clean your room up. The cleaner is coming tomorrow. This morning I had told Kaiya at least 5 time to make sure her room was clean before going to school. After she left I went upstairs and it was still a mess....
I exploded. I felt like I am not cut out to be a stay at home mom anymore and that this whole time I have been failing. I spend pretty much every day cleaning up after people. While I clean, the boys are in the other room (or same room) making a mess. The girls come home after school...leave all their stuff by the front door on the floor and then start with their constant messes. I feel like its 4 against 1!
I am glad Cirdan was still around this morning to give me a hug.
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